JokesBoy

I found an online store of rugs today and they had an amazing collection of all types of rugs. Now even better news is that they are doing a clearance sale which means you get heavy discount. Cheap Rugs always a good buy if you are buying them from reputed store like superiorrugs.com because after all, these rugs are going to be put on floor and we are going to walk over them. Rugs are a very good decorative item to have in room, it give a totally different look to room. However while buying rugs, you should take some time deciding which one to buy and most important factor is color. The color of rug should blend with most prominent color in the room or it should be in contrast with the color of walls of room. Design is fully a matter of personal taste. I personally like dark colored rugs with velvet texture and simple patterns of design on them. Benefit of buying rugs at online store is that you can see each and every type of rug within few minutes and compare them which are not possible at store. If you keep on asking shopkeeper for showing more and more verities, he will think that you are only wasting time and not going to but any stuff and only wasting time while at online store, you can look at your convenience and as many times as you want before buying and there is no one to make bad face if you don’t buy after looking for hours. Area rugs for example are quite large rugs and finding all varies at one shop is not possible so people end up buying whatever they find on shop. My opinion is when you are spending money on some item; you should be getting full value of money and a product of your choice, not something you have to buy by making lots of compromises.

There was a young couple, very much in love, who the night before they were to be married, were both tragically killed in an automobile accident. They found themselves at the pearly gates of heaven being escorted in by St. Peter. After a couple of weeks in heaven, the prospective groom took St. Peter aside and said, “St. Peter, my fiance and I are very happy to be in heaven but we miss very much the opportunity to have celebrated our wedding vows. Is it possible for people in heaven to get married?”

St. Peter looked at him and said, “I’m sorry, I’ve never heard of anyone in heaven wanting to get married. I’m afraid you’ll have to talk to the Lord God Almighty about that. I can get you an appointment for two weeks from Wednesday.”

Come the appointed day, the couple were escorted by the guardian angels into the presence of the Lord God Almighty, where they repeat the request. The Lord looked at them solemnly and said, “I tell you what, wait five years and if you still want to get married, come back and we will talk about it again.”

Well five years went by, and the couple still very much wanting to get married, came back. Again the Lord God Almighty said, “Please you must wait another five years and then I will consider your request.”

Finally, they come before the Lord God Almighty the third time, ten years after their first request, and ask the Lord again. This time the Lord answered, “Yes, you may marry. This Saturday at 2:00 p.m., we will have a beautiful ceremony in the main chapel. The reception will be on me!”

The wedding went beautifully, all the guests thought the bride was beautiful. Moses brought some flowers from the Nile River Delta and Ghandi came wearing his finest hand-woven sari. But, you guessed it, the couple was married but a few weeks when they realized they had made a horrible mistake, they just couldn’t stay married to one another.

So they made another appointment to see the Lord God Almighty, this time to ask if they could get a divorce in heaven. When the Lord heard their request, he looked at them and said, “Look, it took us ten years to find a priest up here in heaven; do you have any idea how long it’ll take to find a lawyer?”

A couple, both age 78, went to a sex therapist’s office. The doctor asked, “What can I do for you?” The man said, “Will you watch us have sexual intercourse?” The doctor looked puzzled, but agreed. When the couple finished, the doctor said, “There’s nothing wrong with the way you have intercourse,” and charged them $50. This happened several weeks in a row. The couple would make an appointment, have intercourse with no problems, pay the doctor, then leave. Finally the doctor asked, “Just exactly what are you trying to find out?” The old man said, “We’re not trying to find out anything. She’s married and we can’t go to her house. I’m married and we can’t go to my house. The Holiday Inn charges $90. The Hilton charges $108. We do it here for $50, and I get $43 back from Medicare.”

* Yes = No.
* No = Yes.
* Maybe = No.
* I’m sorry = You’ll be sorry.
* We need = I want.
* It’s your decision = My correct decision should be obvious
by now.
* Do what you want = You’ll pay for this later.
* We need to talk = I need to complain.
* Sure go ahead = I don’t want you to.
* I’m not upset = Of course I’m upset, you moron.
* This kitchen is so inconvenient = I want a new house.
* I want new curtains = carpeting, furniture, and wallpaper.
* I heard a noise = I noticed you were almost asleep.
* Do you love me? = I’m going to ask for something expensive.
* How much do you love me? = I did something today you’re
going to hate.
* I’ll be ready in a minute = Kick off your shoes and find a
good game on TV.
* You have to learn to communicate = Just agree with me.
* Are you listening to me!? = Too late, you’re dead.

Just like reading good jokes make you smile, if you get to know about gadgets which you are looking for, you have a smile while you read about it. I was looking for a Logitech universal remote so that I can operate many gadgets with single remote and I found a cool review of it on Gadget Advisor site. I found this site very useful and recommend it to everyone, for example I got to know about top extensions for Firefox and many useful information. In fact I found entire content of the site very much useful and relevant. Review on online backup service was excellent. People who read gadget reviews and interested in tech news will find this site very useful.

A woman was shopping at her local supermarket
where she selected:

A half-gallon of 2% milk, a carton of eggs, a quart of orange juice, a head of romaine lettuce, a 2 lb. can of coffee, and a 1 lb. package of bacon.

As she was unloading her items on the conveyor belt to check out, a drunk standing behind her watched as she placed the items in front of the cashier.

While the cashier was ringing up her purchases, the drunk calmly stated, “You must be single.”

The woman was a bit startled by this proclamation, but she was intrigued by the derelict’s intuition, since she was indeed single.

She looked at her six items on the belt and saw nothing particularly unusual about her selections that could have tipped off the drunk to her marital status.

Curiosity getting the better of her, she said
“Well, you know what, you’re absolutely correct. But how on earth did you know that?”

The drunk replied, “Cause you’re ugly”

Two nuns are on vacation in Transylvania. Despite all
the warnings to the contrary, they’ve stayed out after
dark. Sure enough, as they’re driving along, a vampire
flies out of the night and lands on their windshield,
hissing and baring his horrible bloody fangs.

“Dear Lord! What shall we do?” cries the first nun.

“Turn on the windshield wipers. Maybe that will break
his grip,” answers the second nun.

No luck. Now the vampire is wet and angry. He claws
at the windshield.

“Now what shall we do?” yells the first nun, getting
even more scared.

“Weave the car back and forth. Maybe he’ll fall off,”
says the second nun.

No luck. The vampire is beating on the glass now, and
it’s starting to crack.

“NOW WHAT!?!?!” cries the first nun.

The second nun tries to remember how to get rid of vampires.
She has a sudden flash of insight. “Show him your cross!”
she yells, triumphantly.

The second nun sticks her head out the window and yells,
“Get off the f*cking car, you a55hole!!”