JokesBoy

A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window.
A while later , a big , strong , mean-looking guy plops down in the seat next to him , and immediately falls asleep.
The little guy starts to feel a little airsick , but he’s afraid to wake the big guy up so he can go to the bathroom.
He knows he can’t climb over him , so he just sits there , looks at the big guy and tries to decide what to do.
Suddenly , the plane hits an air pocket and an uncontrollable wave of nausea passes thru the little guy.
He can’t hold it any longer and he pukes all over the big guy’s chest.
Then , the big guy wakes up , looks down and sees the vomit all over him.
“So,” says the little guy , “Are you feeling better now?”

A four year old little boy was at the doctor’s office with his mother in the waiting room when he spotted a pregnant lady on the other side of the room. Having nothing better to do, he walk over to her and inquisitively asks “Why is your stomach so big?”

She replied, “Im having a baby.” With big eyes, he replied, “Is the baby in your stomach?” She said, “He sure is.”

Then the little boy, with a puzzled look on his face, asked yet another question, “Is it a good baby?” She said, “Oh, yes. It’s a real good baby.” At this point the woman is thinking the little boy is incredibly cute and looks foward to what he has to say next…

And, much to her suprise, with an even more surprised and shocked look than before, he asks. “Then why did you eat him?”

On their first night together, a newlywed couple go to change. The new bride comes out of the bathroom showered and wearing a beautiful robe. The proud husband says, “My dear, we are married now, you can open your robe.” The beautiful young woman opens her robe, and he is astonished.”Oh, oh, aaaahhh,” he exclaims, “My God you are so beautiful, let me take your picture. Puzzled she asks, “My picture?” He answers, “Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever”.

She smiles and he takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower. He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, “Why do you wear a robe? We are married now.” At that the man opens his robe and she exclaims, “oh, OH, OH MY, let me get a picture”. He beams and asks why and she answers, “So I can get it enlarged!”

1. If time doesn’t wait for you, don’t worry!
Just remove the damn battery from the clock and Enjoy life!

2. Expecting the world to treat u fairly coz u r a good person is like
expecting the lion not to attack u coz u r a vegetarian.

Think about it.

3 . Every lady hopes that her daughter will marry a better man than she did
and is convinced that her son will never find a wife as good as his father did!!!

4 . He was a good man. He never smoked, drank had no affair. When he died, the insurance company refused the claim. They said, he who never lived, cannot die!

5 . So many options for suicide:
Poison, sleeping pills, hanging,
jumping from a building, lying on train tracks,

but we chose Marriage, slow sure!

6 . Only 20 percent boys have brains, rest have girlfriends!

7. All desirable things in life are either illegal, banned, expensive or married to someone else!

8. Laziness is our biggest enemy- Jawaharlal Nehru
We should learn to love our enemies- Mahatma Gandhi

Ab aap bataaye kiski sune bapu di ya chacha di???

9.When things go wrong, when sadness fills your heart,
When tears flows from your eyes always say these words…

Eh Ganpat, chal daru la…

10 . 10% of road accidents are due to drunken driving. Which makes it a logical statement that 90% of accidents are due to driving without drinking!

A mother, accompanied by her small daughter, was in New York City. The mother was trying to hail a cab, when her daughter noticed several wildly dressed women who were loitering on a nearby street corner.

The mother finally hailed her cab and they both climbed in, at which point the young daughter asks her mother, “Mommy, what are all those ladies waiting for by that corner?”

The mother replies, “Those ladies are waiting for their husbands to come by and pick them up on the way home from work.”

The cabby, upon hearing this exchange, turns to the mother and says, “Ah, C’mon lady! Tell your daughter the truth! For crying out loud…They’re hookers!”

A brief period of silence follows, and the daughter then asks, “Mommy, do the hooker ladies have any children?”

The mother replies, “Of course, Dear. Where do you think cabbies come from?”